Time to start ramping up for next round

We have had a really good break in the action over Christmas.  Though Q has been extremely tired physically, she managed to get out on Christmas Eve to go out to dinner and church with our family.  It's been great to have all the kids home over break and they've been very helpful around the house.  

As far as upcoming medical stuff, Susie has the following:

- Monday 12/29 @ 11:30 - CT scan of her abdomen and pelvis to decide on treatment for her l      liver

- Tuesday 12/30 @ 6:15 AM - MRI of Susie's brain to see if there is any additional cancer there

- Friday 1/2 to meet with Dr. Rouch (liver surgeon) to discuss results of CT scan  and discuss treatment

Susie is experiencing a mixture of emotions regarding this stuff.  On the one hand. she really wants to get after the remaining cancer in her body in hopes of being able to have a new starting place for healing.  On the other hand, there is the anxiety of waiting to find out the results of the scans and going through the next phase of treatment.  

Your prayers and generosity have meant so much to Q and our family during this unusually difficult time for us.  We thank you and love you.

-Scott

Thank You, Lord!

Wow!! Talk about answered prayer!! As SOON as I left the computer, my mom's doctor called (we thought we might not even hear results until tomorrow), and he said he looked at the scans and did not see new growth and there is NO swelling!! He said that she is probably having mini seizures (which is exactly the word I would use to describe what I saw today). He said that is normal, and that she will just increase her seizure medicine and will continue to take it for the next six months. Talk about emotional roller coaster...all I can said is Praise the Lord.

Wow. I am wiped out. Thank you, Lord.

Molly

Quick Update, Test Results Coming

Last night, my mom woke up twice in the middle of the night with her eyes moving rapidly back and forth. Finally, this afternoon, she was asked to go into the hospital for a CT scan to make sure there was no new growth in her brain, etc. She has just been allowed to lower her dosage of the steroids and was warned that some symptoms of the swelling may occur. So, we are praying that these symptoms are in fact JUST the swelling again and nothing of a more serious nature.

After the scan, I took her to Starbucks (our favorite hang out) while Dad and Josh went to the grocery. As we sat there, she suddenly froze up, eyes shifting between me and the wall. I was asking her questions but she couldn't respond, so I grabbed her hand and she was very warm. I continued to ask her questions and try to her her attention, asking her if she wanted to go out to the car, and she still couldn't respond. It was so scary! I was debating whether to call an ambulance (while the rest of Starbucks continued chatting around us, like in a scary movie), and after a VERY long two minutes or so, she snapped back and we sat there while she recovered.

I don't know what that was a symptom of, but between seeing that and now waiting for the scan results, I am very unsettled. Please join with us in prayer that this was just some swelling of her brain and nothing more serious -- it was a very disappointing and scary little setback after such a great week.

Though my emotions are great right now, I continue to trust that God "knows the plans he has for my family and me, plans that will prosper us and not harm us, plans that will give us a hope and future." Lord, help me to rest in that promise right now.

Molly

Surgery Info

Hi friends,

Wanted to let you know that regarding Mom's liver surgery, she will be meeting with Dr. Horner (neurosurgeon) to get the "ok" to move forward on January 8th. If all goes well, she will be setting a date for surgery shortly after that (we hope) for the surgery which will remove half of her liver we are told. People are able to function with just half our liver, and it's the only organ that regrows itself!

Following the recovery of her liver surgery, Dr. Horner wants to give her some brain radiation. That would take place sometime in early spring we are thinking. So, there is still a road ahead, but God continues to be so good.

So right now we are in a "down" time. Two years ago when Mom found the initial melanoma on her leg, we were all in a panic. Then, post surgery we could relax and have some down time. Then, back to panic this summer when we found out that it had spread to her lymphnodes. Around October, we were finally able to feel the down time again as Mom started to get back to her "normal" self. Four weeks ago, we were again in a panic with the news that it had now spread to her brain and liver, and I wasn't sure I would ever be able to FEEL the calm of a down time again after that news.

But, Tuesday night I went over to my parent's house, and my mom was lying on the couch (where I've seen her a lot for the past 4 months). I was determined to not cry that day becasue I was so tired of crying, especially after the funeral weekend. But my mom, in only a way that a mother can, asked me why I was so quiet that night. I still held back the tears because I knew a dam was about to break (again), and then the TV had a tender mother-daughter scene (on The Biggest Loser, of all shows), and I lost it. My momreassuringly said, "Molly, I feel better about all of this than I have in a long time."

So, I thought, if she's feeling okay about everything right now and she just had brain surgery, than I need to trust and CHOOSE to be okay with where we are for now. And what better time to just enjoy where we are right now than the Christmas season? I praise God that our current "down time" gets to be during Christmas and New Years. What a gift to us after all the panic!

In my future down days, I will cling to the fresh and new meaning I have found and experienced in this very familiar verse:

"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petiton, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus." --Philippians 4:6-7

Molly

Turn the Page

I'm sorry that it's been awhile since our last posting. With getting Q settled in at home and working through all the stuff that comes with the death of a parent, and starting work again...well, you know.

My Mom's (Deborah McCracken) funeral was beautiful and very much a celebration of her life. So many loved and respected her. Now comes the next hard part for my Dad -- walking through an empty house full of memories and reminders. His tears are close to the surface and his heart is hurting. Please keep him in your prayers. Maybe ask the Lord to give my Dad (Howard McCracken) a clear and fresh sense of his presence and comfort.

Susie continues to heal and handle a little more each day. Today she has two doctors appointments. She will visit her neurosurgeon to get the 27 staples removed from the top of her head, and hopefully will be told she can begin reducing her steroid dosage -- she is really puffed up from that stuff and it affects her blood sugar, etc. The other appointment is with our family doctor to keep track of vitals and her basic condition. Q went on an errand with our neighbor yesterday and returned really tired -- she just can't handle much yet.

From here it looks like Q will just rest and get as healed as she can until Christmas, but immediately following will be in surgery again to remove the cancer in her liver. As much as we all hate that thought right now, we just want to go after this thing and get her to a new starting point. Obviously, we will keep you posted on when the surgery will be when we find out more.

Yesterday I met a man sitting in the waiting room of the AttaBoy Plumbing office who I'd never seen before and when I was introduced he said, "Wait, I know your name from somewhere. Oh, does your wife have cancer? We've been praying for her." It is incredible and humbling that so many people - many we will never meet this side of Heaven - care enough to pray for Susie and our family! Wow!! Thank you all sooooo much.

I'll end this post with a portion of Scripture that was very meaningful to my Mom and is certainly pertinent to us all:

Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.
- 2 Corinthians 4:16-18

- Scott

Latest on Q

It looks like Susie will be able to come home tomorrow (Sunday) morning. As of last night she was still having some problems keeping her blood pressure down, but hopefully that will be resolved. The doctor has kept her visitors to a minimum and just for immediate family. She can only handle our visits for a short time and our goofy chatter has to be kept in check -- it's just too much stimulation for her and she can't handle it. Her beautiful little face is really puffed up by the heavy doses of steroids she's on to keep brain swelling down, but they will be reducing dosages soon. She is so grateful for all the love, prayers, and caring for our family that everyone has been giving us.

The girls and I (Scott) will be at my mom's viewing/visitation after I bring Susie home from the hospital tomorrow. We have some friends who will stay with Q at home. I know she wishes she could be there and at the funeral on Monday, but it would be too much for her. Susie really loved my mom and Mom really loved Q. Please continue to pray for my family during this time...especially my dad.

Love to you all,
Scott

Grandma's homegoing was today

I got the news today that my Mom died in her Carmel home with my Dad and sisters near her. We new she was going to die soon and she had been especially struggling to let go over the past couple of weeks. As sad as it is to lose her it is also a relief to know her struggle is over and she is now with her Lord. I especially hurt for my Dad who had been Mom's man for about 71 years. He's really sad. It looks like her viewing will be at the Carmel Flanner & Buchannan mortuary on Sunday,12/7, from 1:00-5:00 PM. The funeral will be at The Church at the Crossing at 1:oo PM on Monday,12/8.

- Scott